From the future

Greetings from the year 2045. Due to amazing advances in Google technology (all hail our overlords, masters of time and space), I'm able to post this …

FROM THE FUTURE

According to my calculations, this post should happen sometime in the summer of 2010, which, if I recall correctly, is after I met my wife and had kids, but before I got my superpowers, walked on the moon, and won the Oscar for playing myself in the movie based on my life (I really nailed the impression).

Things are really crazy here IN THE FUTURE. We finally did away with Fossil Fuels and all our vehicles are all powered by a revolutionary technology that extracts energy from the power of suck. Perez Hilton, Joe Theismann, the entire 'E' network, and the people who made 'Streetfighter, the Legend of Chun Li' now perform a valuable national service and give us enough clean energy so that we no longer have a dependance on foreign oil.

The National Debt was eliminated by instituting the 'stupid tax'. Every time somebody posts a youtube video of somebody purposely hitting themselves in the balls, the IRS comes and confiscates everything they own and shoots them in the head. Honestly, their stupidity was going to kill them eventually anyway…it's really just being humane. And it prevents these idiots from harming anyone else with their nonsense. Win/Win

Also in Sports, after a dismal start in the new millennium, I'm pleased to report that the San Francisco 49ers are now working on their 14th straight Superbowl, and just as awesome, the Mariners killed the Yankees. No, not playing baseball. I mean they actually brought machine guns into the stadium and killed everyone in the Yankee's organization. Within the city limits of New York City It is considered to be the greatest tragedy since 9/11. Outside of New York, I don't think anybody noticed.

The President…wait, I guess you know him as Chris…he is doing well. I think Janel being the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court probably helps. Or it may actually hinder him. They still still fight a bit. Executive and Judicial! You know how it is…

Anyway, the reason I came back in time is to tell you this: It is vital that everyone reading this ties their shoelaces EXTRA TIGHT on November 3rd, 2010. I can't tell you why, but trust me when I say that the very fate of the world depends on it.

Onward and upward!
-Future Paul

iPhone 4.0

Yes, I bought another iPhone. No, I did not stand in line for it. I preordered from the Best Buy in Silverdale, I walked in, I bought it, and then I walked out. Easy peasy. Advantage of living in a small town I suppose.

I'm following some people on twitter that said they stood in line for 4 hours...those people are nutso. I'd have given up, heh.

I've been asked why I bought an iPhone. After all, I'm a monumental geek. I believe open source leads to increased innovation, better security, and more functionality. Even though they are inherently more stable, I dislike closed proprietary systems. I don't like Apple's implementation of the App store. Specifically, I do not like the fact that they reject apps solely because they duplicate the functionality of the preinstalled apps.

If an app developer can build me a better mail or calendar app…they should be able to do so. I'll pay for it. A closed rejection system that has no 3rd party oversight is Apple trying to go all Big Brother on me, and I don't care for it.

I also disagree with Apple's stance on flash. Will it ruin battery life, crash unexpectedly, and open up my iphone to security holes? Maybe. But give me the option! Warn me if you must, but let me decide! Give me a choice. Maybe I don't care so much about battery life. You have given me a platform…let me use the platform to do what >I< want to do, not what you want to let me do.

Anyway, if you look at all of that, you'd think I'm hopping on the Android express. After all, it is the literal fix for all that is wrong with the iphone.

But…

Even with all it's problems, the iPhone does some things so amazingly well, that for me to move to another platform, somebody will have to do something AMAZING.

The first thing is battery life. The new iPhone blows the competition out of the water. It isn't even close. Even discounting the reports on the internet of amazing longevity, in the limited test I did this morning…it is impressive. A full 1.5 hour commute on my old 3GS takes about half my battery life. If I didn't plug it in while I was at work, it would be near empty when I got home (after the 1.5 hour leg on the other end). When I got in this morning…my battery life was down to just 85%…and I was watching video the WHOLE way in this morning. Amazing.

The second is apps. I am a heavy user of apps. There is literally an app for everything and I use them all. I spend 3+ hours commuting every single day, and during my commute, my iphone is my primary entertainment device. I play games, watch movies, listen to podcasts, surf the web, listen to music, goof around with doodling in mobile sketchbook, mess with guitar riffs in 'iShred', and if I'm feeling especially productive, I can even vpn into work and work through an ssh terminal or even a full remote desktop.

Does Android have an app for all that? Maybe…but all those things already exist on the iPhone and they are incredibly easy and simple…I don't have to work at it to make it work.

The point I guess is that I'm sticking with the iPhone for one simple reason: It works. It does everything I need it to, the interface is extremely good, and it finally can stream pandora while I'm playing games. Now I just need the iShred authors to update their software so that it works in ios4. Then I'll be set. :)

Price drops

I just read a story that flabbergasts me.

The Nook just dropped in price. It was 259 bucks, now it is down to 199 bucks, so many customers who purchased it say…a month ago are pissed and believe they are owed a refund.

This happened with the original iPhone, and many, many, many, other electronic devices including PC's and other peripherals.

What flabbergasts me about this attitude is that…it is the very NATURE of technology. Technology gets better, thus the older technology drops in price, eventually being superseded entirely by more advanced technology.

If you want to buy technology that never drops in price, you will be hard pressed to find it. As of this writing both the Kindle and Nook have recently dropped in price. And, I'll go out on a limb and say that within the next say…6 months, there will be an announcement of a feature upgrade for each of these devices. Why? It is the cycle of these things…

You release a product, give it some time, drop the price some to generate more sales mid-product cycle, release an update at the same time as another price drop and the cycle repeats.

Here is the approach I take to this stuff, and recommend to people:

Figure out if the hardware you are about to purchase is worth the price they are asking. If it is, buy it. If not….don't. This is a personal thing. The kindle isn't worth a thing to me, as I still like to read real books. Call me a technophile if you must, but I like and understand the book interface, and I don't need 2500 books in my pocket wherever I go…I only read one at a time.

At any rate, Kindle at 150 bucks (or whatever it is right now) = not worth it. iPhone 4 at 200 bucks = worth it. For me. Your mileage may vary.

And if they drop the iPhone price to 99 bucks in a few months…it doesn't matter. It was worth the price to me when I bought it. I certainly don't expect a refund. It sure doesn't work the other way right? If Apple raised the price, I wouldn't expect a bill in the mail:

"Dear Valued Apple Customer,
Due to the overwhelming volume of iPhone 4 orders, we've decided to raise the price by 10 bucks in order to make massive amounts of cash and fill a swimming pool with hundred dollar bills and just burn it. I mean, how cool would that be? So enclosed you will find a bill for 10 dollars. If you don't pay this bill, we will shut your phone off and email the nudie pics that you took of your girlfriend that one time to your mom and everybody at your work (she is very hot by the way).

Hugs and Kisses,
Steve Jobs"

It is important.

Paul: I HAVE A VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION FOR YOU

Paul: ARE YOU THERE?

Paul: VERY IMPORTANT

Paul: QUESTION

Paul: HELLO

Paul: VERY

Paul: IMPORTANT

Paul: ARE YOU IGNORING ME?

Paul: I WILL NOT BE IGNORED

Paul: I hate you so much right now

Shana: what the hell do you want?

Paul: You walk away when I have important questions

Paul: VERY IMPORTANT

Shana: I'M TRYING TO GET KIDS TO SCHOOL!!!!!

Paul: fine.

Paul: I won't ask

Paul: the extremely important question

Paul: which will alter the course of our lives

Paul: forever

Shana: oh

Shana: my

Shana: god

Paul: but you know

Paul: I'm sure you have more important things to do than deal with life altering queries

Paul: You should definitely get the kids to school though

Paul: are the kids in school yet?

Paul: are you ready for my question?

Shana: what is it

Paul: so my question

Paul: are you ready?

Paul: This is a decision that will impact our future together

Shana: Paul...

Paul: Are you sure you don't want to be Sith?

Shana: Is that really the fucking question?!

Paul: ITS IMPORTANT

Shana has left the conversation.