Training my replacement

So today at work, I'm putting together training materials for somebody who will 'be my backup for when I go on vacation'.

This has me worried somewhat.

Well, I should say that the economy has me worried. So far, every quarter this year, there have been substantial layoffs in my company. Last week we just went through one that cut deeper than any of the previous ones. We have lost all of the contractors in my department as well as two full time employees.

For those that don't know, my company is a medium-sized company that has now spun off to a wholly-owned subsidiary of a much larger company. (A...giant company that will remain nameless on my blog, but everybody reading knows who it is.)

The larger company is pushing a particular margin on my company, in an effort (in my opinion) to make it look attractive to potential buyers. In order to make the margins in a declining economic landscape, you have to cut overhead. IT is 100% overhead.

So, they've slashed. Projects, headcount, upgrade budgets, HR, travel, training, and anything else they can cut, they've snipped.

So it is with this backstory that I'm sitting down with my Manager for my 1 on 1, and she tells me that I need to train a 'backup'. Now, I'm 100% sure that she doesn't have any ulterior motives with this training. I'm 100% sure, that from her perspective, this is just creating some redundancy in the team so that I can take vacations without being called every 10 minutes.

I'm sure of that at least.

The problem is that I do not trust the people up the chain to be of the same mindset. I don't think that the VP necessarily has my vacation plans in mind when he suggested that someone on his old team could play 'backup' for me (he just got promoted to VP...previously he was a director in that department). I think there is a strong possibility that they are making this move so that when the next quarter comes around, he has another option, should they need to make another cut.

In the end, I trust him to do what is best for the bottom line to make the margin goals set for the company at that time, and I'm pretty sure that means cutting me next quarter, if they wind up having to make further cuts.

So I'm faced with this dilemma: Train the person well, and hope for the best? Train them poorly, watch them make mistakes, and make myself seem irreplaceable? Or, train them well and look for another job.

Yeah, I'm a professional, so I can't do #2, so I'll do my best while training (obviously). #2 still crosses my mind of course... :P. It is still a pretty crappy situation overall. Really have to make sure the old resume is updated and start putting it out there. ugh.

I guess I'd feel more comfortable if I were learning somebody else's job as well, so as to provide THEM with backup, that way I could feel like it was something happening around the company to everyone, but alas...I think it is just me.

I feel like I'm playing musical chairs in my job. This quarter the music stopped and I still had a seat. Next quarter I may be out of luck. Guess we will find out in August.

In the meantime, I'm going job hunting. In this economy, it isn't a great time for it, but don't have a lot of choice at the moment. /sigh...I hate job hunting.

Little League.

So this year Chris played little league again, and had a less than stellar season. He did well, but I was fairly disappointed. Not in the kids, but the coaching.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not one of 'those' parents. I understand fully that the coach is a volunteer position, and I really have no right to complain if I'm not willing to put forth the time and effort to coach myself. And, I just don't have the time. Practices happen at times that I just can't be there for. And I wind up missing 2-3 games a season due to work and the giant body of water that exists between work and home. So I'm not complaining. Well, maybe a tad. A smidgen. A scotch.

I'm pretty disappointed. Not because the team hasn't won a game. Not at all in fact, I could really care less about the outcome of an individual game. I'm more concerned with the fact that over the course of the year, I haven't seen the kids get better. In fact, they have developed some bad habits, and those bad habits aren't being corrected.

I do not like to coach from the stands. I'm really the quietest guy in on the bench for the most part. I do the customary cheers and encouragements, but I don't like to correct kids, and I hate parents who do. This year, I had to break that rule a few times.

A pet peeve of mine is watching a kid go to the plate and have their bat on their shoulder. I've seen it time and time again this season...and it isn't being corrected. Kids aren't taking practice swings. The kid playing catcher for most of the season closes his eyes on almost every pitch (and surprise surprise, the ball gets by him a lot..) The kids on the bench are not encouraging their teammates like they should be...they aren't really involved in the game. Occasionally I hear them in the dugout arguing over whose fault the last mistake was. The coach of the team at least twice a game doesn't know how many outs there are. I don't think he is very involved in the game either, which I'm sure is why the kids aren't involved in the game.

The second baseman plays out of position, and has the entire season...he is almost playing in front of the center fielder. The first baseman is over so far that he might as well be playing second base sometimes. When Chris played first base, for two games he was in the wrong spot, and was doing the wrong thing on every single pitch. After every pitch, before the ball was hit, he would put his head down and run to first base (not watching the ball at all). I waited two games for the coach to correct it, before I finally had enough and snuck over to the first base line and started coaching Chris from the other side of the fence. I hated myself for doing it too, but now Chris doesn't do it anymore. I'm happier now.

Shana thinks the Coach just wants the kids to like him, so he isn't overly critical. I understand the approach. (Time to do the inevitable WoW reference...standby...). When I first started raid leading, I was not critical of people at all. If I saw someone make a mistake, I just hoped that person saw the mistake as well, and I hoped he didn't do it again. It sometimes worked, and it sometimes didn't. I didn't want to be disliked, or lose somebody off the team, so I let it go.

Lately I don't do that as much. I play now on a progression team. In short, a progression team is one that wants to get better, everytime we go out. Kind of like a sports team in that way. If somebody makes a mistake, I have to point it out. Not to tear them down...not at all. I want them to be better. I want them avoid making that same mistake again.

In many ways, the same can be applied to little league. Obviously you can't mention it in EXACTLY the same fashion as I mention it to ADULTS... you do have to handle it gently and in an encouraging fashion, but in the end you have to show them that they are making a mistake, and show them how to do correct that mistake. Find the flaws, and show them how to eliminate that flaw and get better. That, to me, is the very definition of coaching.

Anyway, I'm just kind of disappointed. I'm not mad, angry, bitter, or resentful. I know the coach tried hard. He didn't have a lot of help with assistant coaches and the parental involvement with the team was very spotty at best. My wife did the scorekeeper spot, and as far as I know, she was the only mom who participated in the team at all. Not even a team mom to help organize things.

So it is definitely not his fault completely. Though I do have to say I'm going to work on... "creatively avoiding" Chris going to his team next year. Nothing personal, heh.

Serious Crimes!!

I told you it was weird...you have been warned:

My name is Dan, and I'm a cop. I run the serious crimes division of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. My task is to track down and apprehend the criminal masterminds behind plots to destroy American Grocery and Food Distribution Establishments. I'm the best at what I do.

Saturday December 1st
8:32am -- After a quiet jog around the neighborhood on my day off, I stopped by the office to catch up on a little paperwork when I felt a rumbling in my stomach indicating that I require sustenance. I break for the local breakfast chain resteraunt with the Golden Arches to pick up a Sausage McMuffin with egg, two hashbrowns and a coffee. Cream. No Sugar. Neat.

8:48am -- Consuming breakfast alone in my 1998 Bright Atlantic Blue Ford Escort due to restaurant facility cleanliness issues. I spill a little coffee on my seat cushion. Mental note: Must get new zebra striped seat cushion.

9:04am -- Suspect enters the premises and orders a Big Mac meal with a small diet coke. He is informed that they cannot serve big macs until 10am. Suspect is unhappy but settles on a McGriddle. Sausage. With Cheese.

9:08am -- Workers note the suspect obtained his food and cup for his drink. Suspect moves to vending apparatus to fill his cup with liquid refreshment. There is a large 'No Refills' sign decorating the apparatus.

9:23am -- I walk in to inform establishment management of suspicious, phlemn-like taste in my cup and offer to write a strongly worded letter to the supplier of their coffee bean product. I suspect their supplier has been comprimised by the CLO -- the Columbian Loogie Organization. This terrorist organization seems to have infiltrated every major resteraunt I frequent. Perhaps they know of my open investigation into their activities? Good. It means I'm getting close.

9:24am -- As I explain my offer to an oddly giggling manager, I see the suspect finish his meal and go to refill his cup, despite the prominently displayed signage. Code 487, theft in progress. I move quickly to apprehend the suspect, but slip and fall on the recently mopped floor. I think we may have a crafty villian here. This mastermind orchestrated the plot and timed the moment of his theft and escape with the laughing worker's terribly inefficient mopping duty. Round one goes to the suspect.

10:03am -- I pull the survellience video of the store, confiscate the contents of the trash recepticle, and call in a fingerprint team to dust the table where the suspect allegedly consumed his McGriddle breakfast sandwich for prints.

10:08am -- Call in the DNA team to gather evidence from the store. There is a lot of trace evidence to be gathered here, but we can start by running all of the DNA we aquire through our database of known code 487 suspects and start narrowing the suspect list and questioning for alibis. Meanwhile, I take to the streets.

10:36am -- I start with the local neighborhood, going door to door asking if anybody has seen any suspicious persons walking through their neighborhood carrying what appears to be a small soda from the local establishment. Looks like a dead end. Or the neighbors aren't talking. Could they be part of a larger ring of refill thieves, covering for their co-conspirators?

10:49am -- I call in a favor with the boys at CIA. They are going to put a bird overhead and see what the satellite imaging from this morning tells us about our perp.

11:43am -- DNA calls and tells me we have 1,462 individual DNA samples collected from the facility, including 397 felons, 12 known child molestors, and what appears to be donkey semen. I'm fairly certain that the suspect was not a donkey, but I'm not ruling anything out at this point.

12:32pm -- Finally have the results back from the fingerprint lab. They had 24 individual samples from the booth occupied from by the suspect, and none match any of the DNA found. I must take care to remember: Donkeys do not leave fingerprints.

2:18pm -- The boys at Langley have come back with survellience footage tracking the suspects movements from the time he left the facility to his place of employment. He works at a Starbucks down the street, a competing breakfast chain. It is possible we are dealing with something deeper and more diabolical, which could include corporate espionage. And how does the donkey play in? Nothing on the satellite about the donkey. Too bad.

3:41pm -- Called in the SWAT boys and went to Starbucks. Took the employees downtown for questioning.

4:12pm -- The employees prove to be tough nuts to crack. Their story is that they don't know anything about masturbating donkeys or international refill thieves. We will see.

5:56pm -- Made the call to send the employees to Guantanamo for a little sweat in the hot box. Maybe a little Water Boarding will get the truth out of them.

6:43pm -- The threat of incarceration in anti-terrorism facilities seems to have put a chink in their armor. One of the employees claims responsibility for the orginal theft. Still claims ignorance of the donkey. Tough nut to crack. I ship him off to the interrogation experts at Guantanamo to see if they can get anything more. A few years with them, and the conspiracy will be revealed for certain.

All in a days work...at SERIOUS CRIMES!!!

Away from the blog

I've been away from the blog for a little bit (In fact, both blogs), mostly due to a few things going on right now.

My biggest thing is Job related: I found out in early May that all of the projects my team has been tasked to work on in in Fiscal Year 2010 (which starts in July) are currently unfunded. What does this mean?

Well, that is the big question...

First, they cut all of the contractors on my team. This included a couple who had been here for 3+ years. Very sad. They also killed any part time help, which included the replacement that I use when I go on vacation (I'm currently the only individual in the company who does my particular job).

Currently their 'plan' is to cross train someone to do my job. Someone who has never done any of the things I do, and already has way too much on their plate with their current job to ever really dig in depth on my stuff. Basically it means to me that when I go on vacation I can expect that I will spend the next month fixing whatever the other person screwed up. Lovely.

Also, because I have no funded projects, I will be 'cross-training' over to another function as well. Yup...I get to screw things up for another person while *he* is on vacation. Lovely.

Anyway, due to this mess I've been writing a bunch of things. Writing proposals for my current job, hoping to sway management to divert some funding over to some very important projects. (They actually funded one of those proposals in the final budget, so yay!). Also, I've been polishing up the various resumes, code samples, and other things I will need if something turns very wrong and I do wind up looking for another job (not likely, but never hurts to be careful).

Lay offs are possible, but on my team there are other, more likely candidates...so I'm not overly worried, though (obviously) I still hate to see anybody go at all.

In addition to the 'serious' stuff, I've been playing a little (a lot) of WoW, playing Rock Band with the kiddos, and writing some short stories that I don't really care to publish at all right now...probably ever. Currently all the stories seem to come from that very crazy place in my brain and they...don't really make a hell of a lot of sense (to anybody but me. Scratch that....even I'm confused sometimes).

Still, I'm entertained by the writing, which is the only good reason to write.

As an example, I wrote a little short story about a Reality TV show that uses the same techniques that shows like CSI use to catch murderers (DNA evidence, fingerprints, audio/video dissection, etc), as well as 'enemy of the state' style satellite surveillance, SWAT teams and FBI agents.

...All to catch people who shoplifted 99c candy bars from grocery stores. It is told in 'dragnet style' from the perspective of the lead investigator on the case. I call it 'Serious Crimes!!' and it made me laugh. But I doubt it would make anybody else laugh and it is decidedly from that strange and bizarre place in my brainz that really should never be public on the interwebs, heh.